Hey ! I am Maneet. Lets read my blogs.

I feel strangely lonely

when I have chosen to be alone

I feel a yearning

when I have chosen to be blind

I hope it is a passing failing

because I cannot be seen to fail

So I will still be lonely

but with a smile on my face :-)

This is not a Poem.

Just a piece of writing to emphasize the irony of my life.

so there I was..... looking snazzy, dressed in my Massimo Dutti suit, wearing Desire Blue by Davidoff... Escorting a girl in my Honda to a party... that turned out to be 'THE' party in the city that day.

It started as a nice party. got introduced to quite a few Biggies in the Fashion & Film Industry. had a few glasses of white wine... chilled out. met some friends.. chatted up.

And then started the photographers....

Btw, did I tell you that the girl I was escorting was a Fabulous Looker... and so there it was, photographers trying to get a hint of her smile.

and since she was having a few drinks... those smiles were also happening. And that meant the attention from the photographers and the appreciative glances from the men around was also happening.

And somewhere there... in that creme-de-la-creme setting I realised that 7 years I had known this girl, admired her for her intelligence, her strength of character, her yearning to be an Indian while being an NRI, her caring attitude towards family, her fierce belief in me as a nice guy....

somewhere there... it was never going to happen. I wasnt in love with her.

I wasnt afraid. I had arrived.

And no, she was giving me the attention too. That wasnt the problem either. she wasnt flirting with the men either....

But the dancing on the floor, without looking at me.

The retching on the Seafront at Gateway of India till 4am...

The problem was not her...

And when you realize that it is you, you have no one to get angry at.

Its simply a disappointment... a realization... that an era has come to an end.

Today, she left back for her country.

And I didnt call to say Bye.

I dont want to raise the spectre of meeting again with the same perked up smile.

We will be friends... but never the same.

Its insightful how your mood can rub off on other people.

Yesterday morning, I woke up with that sensation of dread.. that something is wrong.

And sure enough, I got a call from my Boss's boss that I was required for a meeting that I would never be able to reach in time for.

So I sped.. and there was this Old dude in a spanking new BMW who was understandably driving it like a Buffalo cart.... sloooowwwwlly.

But I was a man in a hurry and was cutting through the Mumbai traffic like a hot knife through butter.

So I honked and honked.. but he just wouldnt give way. And those of you who know what Mumbai traffic is like, will understand how crucial it is to cross a slow moving car.

I got angry but didnt say anything.

Finally I got a chance to pass him... and so I did.

What I didnt realise was.. that my lil brother sitting next to me... was showing the Old cultured dude "the Finger" ;-)

I immediately realised that patience was supposed to have been the flavour of the moment.

But that realization 'was' too late ;-)

well.... he got a finger.... He also got the BMW.

I say ! Whats a Finger when you have a BMW ! ;-)

What say !

in the end... the smile will remain
because each teardrop will fall
helping a plant grow
and make the flowers bloom
and the butterflies shall fly
and make you smile

so dont worry when you cry
it will help someone smile